2012 has been a tough year for me. I have been through so much bullshit. Now I cannot say that I haven’t had good times. I have also seen that some people are WACK and they had to get out of my life. But lately, life’s woes have made me feel like I want to give up. That I can’t do. See I’m in a predicament. I have to prove a bunch of assholes wrong all while proving to myself that I am capable of ruling the world.
Yeah, I have a tough road ahead….
For the last two weeks, my aunt visited me from Barbados. She has been a joy and it felt good to have family in New York with me. Well, on her last day I spent with her, I had a situation where money went missing out of my account. It left me broke as shit and pretty much ruined my night with my aunt. Not only that, I come home and there was an explosion under my building, causing all the lights and hot water to turn on.
Yeah, a total wtf?
At that point, I was about to say fuck it. I ugly cried and I threw shit. I was ready to throw all of this away and go back to Barbados and start over. But, I had to ask…. why? Would I be happy? Nope. Would I be fulfilled? Pretty much not at all.
So, as much as I am back in the trenches, I will try to keep the faith. I hate that every update about me is some drama, but someone out there is also going through drama. Not everyone has the luxury of being an attention whore on social media. As much as I would love to be driving my Mercedes to my guarded compound with guards complete with snipers, things are not like that right now. I will also admit that keeping the faith has not been my strong suit. I like to do this thing where I renig when things go south. I end up questioning my faith and where I stand in the world. When I am pretty damn good at what I do.
The hard times last because I don’t. I’ll be trying something new starting now.